Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Got Milk?

Looks like the SpeedFixers are taking strange camp rituals (ala Bjarne Riis) to a new level. Don't be surprised if Hanz/Franz start wearing cow suits to the track, test Brains new skills?

Speedfix Bathtime

"Sickboy, I can't find the bar of soap in these weeds, but I'll keep looking!"

Monday, December 29, 2008

Contest!

Guess the SpeedFixer!!!
2 SpeedFixers are in Texaklahoma, the sleeping arrangements are odd to say the least. Which SpeedFixer is in the Lizard pajamas and which one is clinging on for dear life? Winner gets all access privilege to Andy Frye's latest 1000 page treatise "Saturdays Training Ride, How I beat Cleary to the other side of Hopkins "

Where's the Beef!!!

From the Speedfix training camp, tryin to fatten Crosby up?

Thursday, December 25, 2008

Welcome to the Jungle

Yin/yang
The King of Fans creates Hurricane Winds!
Jungle Fever

Steamy in the Banana Republic

I'm melting....

Pie will fatten me back up!

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Fashion Discussion

Apparently a disturbance has been reported at the United Trackie Nation's Headquarters in Mudsling Missouri. Reportedly a fight broke out between two staffers who were beggining the preparation plans for their "CX Racers BEND OveRegon" rally to be held at USA CX Nationals in Dec of 2009. The trackies, not normally known for planning ahead or being able to see past their splintered noses, have been busy as bees sniffing glue and party planning. The disturbance broke out between Brad Snuff and Spike Speedball over the preferred costume choice. Apparently Brad threw a Huff when Spike suggested a Carol Channing outfit versus Snuff's preferred queer eye for the clown guy kit. The argument was forgotten when the participants were sidetracked with the obligatory lunch time baloney sandwich washed down with Busch Light and the testosterone patch chaser.

Epicnicity

With the recent announcement by USA Cycling that CX Nationals will be held in Bend Oregon in 2009 and 2010, local alderman Johann Powers has announced a campaign to officially change the name of Bend Oregon to "Epic City", Oregon. According to Johann, Bend will now be the "Epic" center of the universe and the town should be named accordingly. Johann who also runs the website belgianposeur.com has also discussed plans about trucking in mud from Belgium and painting the local sky gray, if, quote Johann: "global warming caused by the capitalist pigs who drive suv's and don't buy carbon offsets" happens to ruin the expected epicnicity plans.

CX Heaven

CX racers across the US can't believe the good news out of Colorado Springs today. US CX natz in 2000-10 will be held in the mecca of US CX racing, Bend Oregon. Feelings of "epicnicity" in the cx community are at an alltime "high" when the news was released at 4:20. In related news the local Walmart in Bend Oregon is planning to cut back on inventories of deodorant, shampoo and soap for the 2nd week of December for the next 2 years, planning to use the shelf space to sell birckenstocks, hemp capri's, stocking hats with authentic labrador retriever hair already sprinkled throughout and clown-wigs and short shorts for the trekkies. (editors note: this should read "trackies")

Bloodball Party Planning Begins....

The UTN (United Trackie Nation) headquarters located in Mudsling, Missouri is all abuzz with the release of the CX 2009-2010 USA NATS location announced in Bend Oregon. Trackies will gather next fall in Missouri and make the trek to Oregon to dress up like clowns and punch CX racers and possibly spectators. Freshly made posters fashioned with crayons and big chief tablets, announcing "Bend OveRegon CX Racers" and "Get Bendt CX Racers" are already strewn about the dirt floor of the headquarters.

Sausage Casing Futures...

In Bend Oregon have blown through the roof with the news of the 2009-10 USA CX Nats being held there.

CX NEWSFLASH

2009-10 USA CYCLING CYCLO-CROSS NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIPS AWARDED TO BEND, ORE.

Cyclo-Cross National Calendar’s Marquee Event Returns to Pacific Northwest

Contact: Andy Lee (Tel.) 719.866.4867 (Mobile) 719.231.2041 (E-mail) alee@usacycling.org (Website) www.usacycling.org

Colorado Springs, Colo. (December 23, 2008)—The 2009-10 USA Cycling Cyclo-cross National Championships have been awarded to the city of Bend, Ore., the national governing body announced today.

The USA Cycling Cyclo-cross National Championships were last held in the Pacific Northwest when Portland hosted the 2003 and 2004 editions. Since then, the annual event has been held in Providence, R.I. (2005-06) and Kansas City, Kan. (2007-08). With scheduled dates of Dec. 10-13 in 2009 and Dec. 9-12 in 2010, the two-year commitment returns the national championships to one of the most popular hotbeds of cyclo-cross racing in North America.

With more than 2,000 athletes from around the nation expected to compete in Bend next year, 35 national titles will be on the line throughout several categories of racing; including junior, U23, collegiate, masters and elite divisions for men and women.

“Bend is a special place and our entire community is honored to host the cycling world for the USA Cycling Cyclo-cross National Championships,” said Doug LaPlaca, president and CEO of Visit Bend and co-chair of the local organizing committee. “Anyone who has visited Bend understands the enormous enthusiasm and opportunity here – not just for cycling and cyclo-cross, but for sports and recreation in general.”

Considered by many to be a hub for outdoor sports enthusiasts, Bend also plays host to the Cascade Cycling Classic, a USA Cycling National Racing Calendar event, recently hosted the XTERRA Trail Running National Championships, and will host the USA Triathlon Winter Triathlon National Championships next month. Additionally, the town has recently been named America’s Top Adventure Town by Men’s Journal, America’s Top Trail Running Town by Outside, one of the country’s Top-Five Ski Towns by Travel + Leisure, one of the Top-10 U.S. Triathlon Towns by Triathlete and “The Next Moab” by Mountain Bike.

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Monday, December 1, 2008